Unsuspecting salmon are caught by fishing bears as they swim upstream to spawn (the salmon, not the bears). These industrious bears have a net and bucket for catching the jumping salmon and a skip bin to store their bounty.

Most of my knowledge of salmon swimming up-stream and jumping up waterfalls comes from documentaries and John West commercials on TV.

I thought it would be fun to equip the fishing bears for what I’m guessing would be their favourite time of year. When food jumps toward them practically begging to be eaten, the bears must be wondering if it gets any better than this. The bear in the background has a drink with a straw to further indicate how little effort is required to catch the fish given these fishing aids.

I added a few items that I thought might help make their fishing process a little easier. I could have gone overboard and given them spear guns, rods and massive nets but a bucket and hand held net gives the salmon more of a sporting chance. To be fair, I should have given the salmon some form of defense against the fishing bears. Stun guns would be too extreme but something along the lines of a pair of scissors for the net or an air horn to startle the bears at random intervals. It would remain to be seen how the fish would deploy these weapons with their tiny fins.

In reality, I’m sure the fishing bears have their share of problems when it comes to catching the jumping salmon. There would be many swipes and mouth-snaps of nothingness due to insufficient reflex times. I imagine it would be similar to playing Whack-a-Mole, but without the mallet, the whacking and also without the mole. OK, it would be nothing like Whack-a-Mole apart from the fast reaction times required to make contact with salmon (or mole). To make matters worse, the water would be very cold and there would be a notable lack of fishing accessories. Skip bins most notably deficient.